THE DUDE was staring, which made me edgy. When strangers stare, I beware.
I figured I’d draw him out. “What’s up?” I asked. But the dude turned out to be from Germany. He didn’t understand “What’sup?”
His English was bad. My German was worse. But it was clear that he was less interested in me than he was in my truck — the 1996 Dodge Ram Laramie SLT 3500 pickup equipped with an 8-liter V-10 engine. It was a “dualie,” which means it had dual rear wheels — two back wheels on either side of the cargo bed.
Lord, it was a big truck!
The German wanted to check out the engine. I obliged. What the heck? I popped the hood. The dude oohed and aahed all over the place. Then he said something like “want to drive.”
He did a pantomine, stretching out both arms and placing his hands on an imaginary steering wheel. I laughed and said, “No, no.” I mean, I’m a believer in tradition: I’ve gotta know ya and trust ya before I turn over the keys.
Background: Until 1994, when it introduced its totally remodeled Dodge Ram series, Chrysler was a minivan company that happened to sell a few pickups.
Anyone doubting that things have changed has only to drive the biggest and fanciest of Chrysler’s pickups, the Dodge Ram Laramie SLT 3500 dualie. Hugga-mugga! This thing kicks butt!
The Laramie SLT 3500 has the biggest pickup-truck cabin you ever want to see, even in the tested regular cab version, which provided enough wiggle room for three adults. If there’s no third rider, you can fold down the top of the center seat and turn the truck into a rolling office. That top can hold a computer, a telephone or a portable fax machine.
The Laramie SLT 3500 is a work truck, which means I couldn’t test it the way it oughta be tested. This truck is engineered to haul payloads of up to 5,059 pounds and pull trailers weighing as much as 13,000 pounds. It is not meant to run around the suburbs or the paved roads of rural Virginia on a regular basis.
The thing is a monster! Its optional gasoline V-10 engine is rated 300 horsepower at 4,000 rpm with max torque set at 450 pound-feet at 2,400 rpm. It growls and claws its way through urban traffic, scaring other drivers silly.
Standard equipment for the Laramie SLT 3500 includes a 5.9-liter V-8 rated 230 horsepower at 4,000 rpm with max torque set at 330 pound-feet at 3,200 rpm. A five-speed manual transmission is standard; a four-speed automatic with overdrive is optional.
Standard brakes include vented front discs/rear drums with rear anti-lock backup. A four-wheel anti-lock brake system is optional. A driver’s side air bag is standard.
Dodge Ram trucks can be bought a variety of ways: the tested rear-wheel-drive or four-wheel drive, with or without the “dualie” rear wheels; the tested regular cab or optional extended cab; with short or long cargo beds; as the smaller 1500 pickup, the larger 2500 or the gargantuan 3500; with the e ntry level LT decorative package, more-spartan-than-thou Work Special trim, or the upgraded ST and luxury SLT trim.
Complaints: Too many trim packages and equipment combinations in this pickup line. That means too many chances for putting the pieces together wrong. Chrysler needs to simplify the Dodge Ram lineup. Also, what genius decided to install the ceiling-mounted handle — used to assist vehicle entry — only on the passenger-side of the truck? I’m short. I could’ve used that handle on the driver’s side.
Praise: It’s so big, it’s the mother of all pickups — and the father, too.
Head-turning quotient: People got out of the way. Chrysler should call it the Chrysler Intimidator.
Ride, acceleration and handling: Boffo acceleration. Totally truck ride and handling, especially when the cargo bed is empty. Those lightly loaded dualie wheels bounce like mad on slightly rough roads. Braking was excellent.
Mileage: Maybe 12 milesp r gallon (35-gallon tank, estimated 400-mile range on usable volume of regular unleaded), running mostly highway and driver only with light cargo.
Sound system: Optional six-speaker AM/FM stereo radio and cassette with CD changer and graphic equalizer, Infinity system. Very nice.
Price: Base price is $19,144. Dealer’s invoice is $16,727. Price as tested is $26,087, including $6,343 in options and a $600 destination charge.
Purse-strings note: To amortize the value of the Laramie, buy it for its intended purpose — to work — and then work it until it dies. Compare with GM’s C/K 3500 and Ford’s F-350 series trucks.